[5067]
Only upon arrival in this last Egyptian city did I learn that the Lord had made a great visit to your family which is so dear to me. Fr Squaranti had been told of this a month ago in Cairo. But knowing me well, he kept silent even with me. When I was informed, Sr Teresa knew nothing of it. She only complained several times during the journey on the Nile that, while I had received a letter from my father and from the Verona Institute, she had not had a single line from her family.
[5068]
Fr Antonio gave me the news yesterday at 10 a.m. At 1 p.m., I did not want to go to lunch, because my grief was too great and I feared that Sr Teresa, who sits on my right at table on the ship, would read this on my face. I went at Fr Antonio’s request; and tried in every way to appear detached: but it was impossible. Sr Teresa read my expression, though she appeared detached herself; but as soon as grace had been said, she rushed to Fr Antonio’s room and asked him to speak clearly. Hearing her sighs, I too went there: she said to us: “Tell me the truth, for I will be good and resigned: has my father died?”
[5069]
Fr Antonio and I stood frozen and dumbfounded, unable to utter a sound and in floods of tears, and it was only after ten minutes that we were able to murmur yes… Never have I suffered so much… I knew your family to be the happiest in the world, that it had never experienced the death of a dear one. Teresa had never lost a member of her family; and yet I could tell the full extent of her grief. She loved her father tenderly, for not a day passed without her speaking of him, just as she speaks every day of her mother, her brothers, her sisters and her uncle.
[5070]
But I was amazed at the heroism of your daughter and mine! She is an incomparable daughter, a true saint, she is one of my greatest consolations in my very thorny apostolic career. No sooner had I spoken the word yes, than she went down on her knees and, with her arms wide open before God and the two of us, exclaimed: “Dear Jesus, Heart of my Jesus, Mary Immaculate, St Joseph, with all my heart and soul I offer you my father. Receive him in heaven, if I offer him to you: your most holy will be done, etc. but let him have heaven, where I hope to join him when it pleases you: but grant me the grace of protecting, comforting and defending my mother and my family, dear Jesus; I commend my father, my mother and my family to you; I place my mother and my family in the Heart of Jesus; yes, may thy holy will always be done, oh my God; the cross is great, extraordinary; but you have borne it for me: may you be blessed forever. Oh! father, I will never see you again on earth, but I will certainly see you in heaven; pray for me, for my mother, for my family…” etc., etc.
[5071]
She stayed more than an hour kneeling like this before God and us; the words she uttered were of the most sublime holiness and religion. I have hardly ever seen a daughter so tender and loving towards her parents; and I have never seen so strong, generous, noble and Christian a woman. Oh! she is well worthy of the lofty mission and undertaking to which God has called her. But if I must sing the praises of such a great and holy daughter, I must sing the praises of those who formed her to such perfection and holiness, I must sing your praises, Signora Stella, and the praises of my dear Signor Lorenzo who formed and instilled in the heart of this incomparable daughter so much piety, fervour, zeal, candour and generosity, who formed her in such a way that she may be compared with the sublime women of the Gospel who accompanied and served the Apostles in their preaching.
[5072]
Sister Teresa is a pearl, she is worthy of you and of Signor Lorenzo; she is worthy of comparison with the Lucinas and Petronillas and with the women of the Gospel. Therefore I am convinced that the father who raised and educated such a daughter is in heaven, and now has the prize for his virtues, for his faith and for his exquisite religion. In a word, Signor Lorenzo, whose perfect faith, virtue and attachment to the Church and Pius IX were known to all, is in heaven and is in an exalted place of glory; and from there he will pray for you, for Sr Teresa, for the whole family; and if an angel were to ask him if he were prepared to return to the earth and live another hundred years, he would answer roundly no, because there he is with God, and because from heaven he is more useful to his family than he was when alive.
[5073]
After you have paid your tribute of weeping and tears to your incomparable husband (the most sacred, right and praiseworthy thing, because tears are the holy expression of the perfect love God wants children and wives to have), you must be happy, calm and content, because your dear Lorenzo is in heaven enjoying his reward for the life he led as a true Christian, and from heaven he is in a position to help you down here, and can better protect your family and lead you to fulfil your earthly pilgrimage in a holy way, so as to join him when it pleases God.
[5074]
What I am saying to you, I say also to your children, to Fr Luigi (to whom I shall write as soon as I have time), and to my dear friend, Signor Francesco, Signor Lorenzo’s worthy brother and a true father to all. Yes, you must be happy, resigned and content. I will look after Sr Teresa: she will be one of your greatest consolations. God loves and favours the Grigolini family, because it is a truly Christian family, imbued with the spirit of the Lord, and firm and indestructible in its faith and religion. And God loves this dear family, for he has shown it by calling to his side Signor Lorenzo, such a good father, good husband, good brother, good Christian… Didn’t the eternal Father love his divine Son?… He loved him with infinite love, and therefore he wanted him to die in agony on the Cross.
[5075]
Jesus Christ loved his Most Holy Mother: yet although she was the mother of God, he wanted her to be the Queen of Martyrs. Jesus Christ loves the Church his immaculate Bride: yet he allows it to have tribulations until the end of the world; he wanted it to swim in the blood of martyrs, and today he sends it the tribulation of the death of Pius IX. The saints suffered all things: indeed one can measure the greatness and elevation of their sanctity by the greatness and quantity of the crosses and sorrows they have to bear. What did Queen St Elizabeth not suffer, who after knowing the bliss of the throne, was abandoned and had to go begging with her children, etc. Ah! God loves his favourite children so much that he gives them crosses. So I say that God loves your family because he has sent you a very great cross by taking Signor Lorenzo from you. Since this is the Lord’s will, you must be brave and believe that God loves you. Be comforted, be consoled therefore; and let your whole family take heart. That is what your dear daughter Teresa is doing.
[5076]
In fact, after a brief quarter of an hour, she rose and retired to her room where she found her Sisters who were crying, and they kissed her and bathed her with their tears. I was constantly by her side, and I let her cry for a few hours; but then I told her the above-mentioned truths and others, which the world that has no faith does not understand, but which Teresa understood well. We spent the evening together; and at 10 when I had retired to my room, she spent the night between tears and sleep. In the morning she took part in all the Masses we said on board for Signor Lorenzo, and everyone received communion for him. We spent yesterday alternately crying, praying and working, and talking nearly all the time about Signor Lorenzo, you and the family.
[5077]
Last night Teresa slept and rested; and now she is much brighter and I hope she will soon recover, especially through praying always for him and for you. She lives among peaceful hearts: the Sisters love and respect her as a mother. From the day they left Verona (and I was always with them) these 5 daughters live a heavenly life: I have not seen a single cloud: they love each other more than sisters would: they take turns helping each other, the pleasure of one is the pleasure of the other, Teresa’s wishes are their wishes, their interests are God’s interests and every day I hear your name.
[5078]
Teresa is a true daughter. She is my consolation and Fr Squaranti’s too; and all fired by the same spirit we seek nothing more than to save souls and do our duty. We would not change our condition for a crown, for a throne: we are happier than kings; and as we are prepared to suffer anything and to die for Christ, the days fly by. Tomorrow we shall be entering Nubia, that is, where my Vicariate begins, the largest and most populated diocese and mission in the world, for it contains one hundred million infidels and is larger than Europe.
[5079]
I wanted to write to Fr Luigi (who must have a beautiful soul and an upright mind as I see from the sentiments he expresses to his sister) and to my dear Signor Francesco; but I find I have a mountain of things to do for the unloading of our two great ships and due to the mail I have to write to many parts of Europe and the world. In any case, these days we are celebrating the Masses for our dear Signor Lorenzo, who is all ours because, among the other reasons, he gave us one of his worthy daughters to guide to heaven. But… mark my words, Signora Stella, we do not go to heaven alone; behind us we bring a procession of souls saved from the mouth of hell; so many that when we missionaries and Sisters pass away, St Peter will have to fling open both of heaven’s doors. That is what we hope for, after the Lord has granted us the grace of undergoing and suffering much for him.
Please give my greetings to every single member of your family, to Francesco, to his wife, and most especially to the Archpriest Gazzolato, and give them my heartfelt blessings in the Sacred Hearts of Jesus and Mary, in whom I remain
Yours most affectionately in the Lord
+ Daniel Comboni
Bishop of Claudiopolis i.p.i.
Vicar Apostolic of Central Africa